Last weekend, my mother, my sister, and I took a road trip to visit my other sister at college. The road part was tolerable, and it was nice to see my sister again, but I encountered a conundrum while there.
You see, my sister (who is 2.5 years younger than I) has always been a social butterfly. My social skills have always been greatly lacking due to having Asperger's Syndrome, and I have been quite envious of her supreme sociability for many years now. She's always had more friends than I have, and was super popular throughout high school to the point that she was usually out with her friends more than she was at home. Now, in college she is just as socially adapt as ever, very involved with clubs and activities, knowing seemingly everybody on campus, and even became an RA during her 3rd semester.
While I myself attended college for a little while, and enjoyed several aspects of it, visiting my sister reminded me of how fun it was living on campus and interacting with different people on a regular basis. However, this is where the conundrum comes in. Despite being reminded of the joys of college life, I was also reminded by how much I can't stand other people. While nobody at my sister's college treated me badly in anyway, I was reminded of how annoying and obnoxious people can be merely by observation of their behavior. People being loud and farcical to an unintelligent degree really drive me nuts. I have immense trouble focusing on anything when there are others blabbing off to each and doing things that exasperate me. On top of that, there were people that I encountered that had one or more of the most revolting accessories in my opinion: facial and body piercings. I cannot fathom how anyone could enjoy having those things, enjoying looking at those things, or why anyone would ever ruin the natural beauty of his/her body with those things. Piercings are the biggest factor in me giving up on ever having a romantic relationship with anybody. I could never feel comfortable with a girlfriend or wife with such distracting and disgusting accessories. Even if her personality was great, and her natural appearance breathtaking, I could never fully love someone who thinks it's a good idea to stick metal into her various body parts or thinks it looks good.
So overall, here's the conundrum: I want to be social and hang out with people, but there are just so many people out there that get under my skin with their actions, personalities, and/or unnatural appearances. I'm very close to giving up on others, but I don't want to be an extreme hermit of any sort. I can't completely isolate myself because I will inevitably get lonely and want social interaction. Yet there are so few people out there that I can tolerate that I have yet to meet compared to everyone that I cannot tolerate whether I've met them yet or not. I don't what to do about this predicament, but for now, I'll just have to keep doing things my way.
- William Winkeler
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